There's a lovely song I learned when living on a narrowboat on the Oxford Canal, the chorus of the cleaned-up version was:

Boaty boaty *spit in the Cut
And wipe your *nose on a mopstick

(in reality was *shit and *arse)

the verses concerned ladies that the boatman would encounter as he travelled the canals (the Cut) in the couse of his working life, such as:

I knew a girl in Linslade town
Wipe yer nose on a mopstick
Who drops 'er kecks for half-a-crown
Wipe yer nose on a mopstick

Boaty, boaty spit in the cut
Spit in the cut, spit in the cut
Boaty, boaty spit in the cut
And wipe yer nose on a mopstick

the further he travels, the more expensive it seems to be, and the last verse ends with the moral of the story

"the moral of my story's plain
'tis quicker and cheaper to stay on the train.."

I have this song, and others, on an old LP of canal songs called "Straight From The Tunnel's Mouth"