A fair maid walking all in her garden
A healthy tomcat she chanced to see
He stepped up to her, thinking to mew to her,
Said, now fair maiden would you fancy me?

Oh no, fair kitty, for I have a tomcat
Though he has strayed so far away
I've waited for him for seven years now,
But for seven more, right here I'll stay

Oh if he is seven years a-straying
Perhaps his nine lives all are spent
Perhaps he's been hit by a passing lorry
Or gotten stuck in some wet cement

And if he's been seven years a straying
With another young girl he might be
Perhaps she tickles his furry belly
And dangles string for him by her knee

Oh if he's playing I wish him happy
And if he's roadkill I wish him rest
But I will wait for him in this garden
For he's the tomcat I love best

Well, then this lomcat has started purring
Saying, loyal mistress, look, it's me!
Here's the collar I chewed in half love,
Leaving the other half with thee!

He's leapt up into her waiting arums
Clawing gently up her blouse
And she has tickled his furry ears
And carried him home to her empty house.