So, the inequities need to me remedied.

Our Quaker meeting recognizes gay marriages (once they go through the oversight process, which is required for all marriages under the care of the meeting, whether homo- or heterosexual). I personally would be much more likely to go through a civil union than a religious ceremony if I were getting married since I'm unlikely to marry within my own religion (for various reasons) and since I imagine I'd balk at a lot of the ceremonies performed by other religions, just as a non-Quaker might balk at the ceremonies performed (or not performed) by us. A civil union would make things much easier.

Of course, as someone who walks the line between agnostic and atheist, I have always been offended by the idea that marriage is less valid when God is not a central force. My parents are two of the least religious people I know but probably one of the best examples of a stable, productive, successful marriage (and not just in a bare-bones legal partnership sense).