Crikey! I fought there was somefin' afoote too, I did, but when I 'eard the news I was gobsmacked!!! I 'ad to 'ave a stiff drink and sit down. Then I found I needed another one. Mendicinal purposes, you unnerstand. I find it 'ard to believe Miss Penelope would fly off wif one of them foreign types wot lives in a villa and drinks wine wif 'is breakfast. Shocking! Appalling! I fink I'd better 'ave another jolt and fink about this some more before I am driven to do somefink rash that would reflect badly on Rutledge 'Ouse.

Albert