The Big Rocks-in-the-Head Legislator

One sunny day in the month of May,
When the temperatures were a-spikin'
There in Baton Rouge, a bluenose scrooge
Said there's something I'm not likin'!
I think it's wrong to see the thong
On any young hunk or honey
And if I have my way, it'll be a year and a day
If you show your butt-crack, sunny.

CHORUS

Oh, no belly buttons please
And skirts below the knees
And your pubic hairs I'm a-countin'
If I see even one, exposed to the sun
You're breakng rocks out on the mountain!

Yes the cops will hunt for fuzz in front
And then they'll check out tushes;
God help those they find,
Who let the sun shine
On their butt-cracks or their bushes!
A terrorist may flaunt his list
Of places up which he plans on blowing,
Louisiana cops won't care, if one pubic hair
Or butt-crack may be showing.

CHORUS

At Mardi Gras it's: "Show us your tits!"
And the girls are all complying,
But the bluenose rubes don't mind the boobs
As long as butt-cracks they're not spying.
The morality in New Orleans
Is sure a thing of wonder
They've drawn the line, navel to spine
That your waistline can't go under!

CHORUS

Oh, folks are split, that's at the bottom of it,
About this legislative decision.
No ifs, ands or butts, some say it's nuts
To make an issue of the division.
Sweat rolls down your back
Into your crack in the Delta's steamy weather;
I hope we'll be free to always see
Where the two halves come together.

CHORUS