Aerial view of the village courtesy of multimap - Aerial view of Farlington

>>What's the weather forecast?

Excellent - sun shines on the righteous

>>Do I need to bring my storm guy ropes and pegs?

It depends if he needs them.

>>Do the toilets have wooden seats?

Mens no, ladies unsure. Soft paper.

>>What's for breakfast?

Make it yourself - Ben reckons he will have a hangover. There is a barbq which could be used. More later.

>>Are the showers 20p for 15 minutes.

Hot water available all time. No shower I am afraid.

>>Will there be any cow pooh on the grass?

Is George Bush a moron?

>>Is it flat or hilly?

See picture. Edge of Howardian Hills. 100 year old badger sett up road (very slow badgers...)

>>Is there a tree to wee behind?

Plenty. Most of us tend to use the toilet though. But then we are just simple Hill Folk happily frolicking on the fields with our flint based weapons and tools etc etc

>>Will we be woken early in the morning by bagpipes as it's near Scotland?

My wife's nephew is a trained piper. For a fee something could be arranged...

>>Are high heel shoes out of the question?

You can wear anything you like. Ted had his painted nails on and still was allowed out.

>>I could go on. So I will!

>>Will my double sleeping bag be big enough? How friendly are the sheep?

Friendly to the point of illegality if you really pushed your luck. (I presume that's why you were querying the sleeping bag size?)

>>Do they sell petrol up there?

You have a car? Haven't seen one of those for many a year. Mostly horse and carts here.

>>Should I invest in some new ski's?

Gold is probably a better bit but you really need advice from a qualified financial consultant. I can put you in touch with one if you want.

>>Can we keep any mushrooms that we find?

Is this a Hull game? Like Hunt the Thimble?

>>Will there be any guards on duty?

Nope.

>>How can it be free?

Cos people are wonderful.