1. We're all doomed anyway, so what the fuck?
2. You can suck up to your psycho friends and tell them not to hit you or be angry with you 'cuz you voted their way, ok?
3. If you're a terrorist you can prove that you're the right kind.
4. It increases your chances of meeting Jesus, but it will be during rush hour.
5. If the biggest, wealthiest, most gol-danged POWFUL nation on earth is led by a nutball, it promises to interesting if a bit scary. Something like a Tornado carnival ride without the safety inspections.
6. His daughters have shapely gams -- that's always worth something, as long as no conversation is required.
7. Think of the savings on napkins and letterhead!
8...um....huh...er...it will make his daughters happy?
9. um...Laura will smile more?
10. um..er...jeeze, you guys....c'mon, now...ah...oh! His shit doesn't stink even if his thinking abilities do?


There ya go!! Ten of 'em!!


A