I'd say it depends on whether the vegetable garden is necessary to your economic survival or is a mutually agreeable joint hobby or is her baby and you are dragged into it. If #1, you do have a responsibility for it unless you have both agreed that you will do more of the wage earning and she will do more of the gardening. If #2 you have less responsibility but probably should have noticed. If it is her thing and she just wants you to help out, and you are otherwise contributing fully to the family enterprise, either financially or domestically, then I can't see what you did wrong. You were willing to help when asked but since it is not your thing (if that is the case) and you are agreeable to it but not totally enthused, then she is being unreasonable. If the family is going to suffer without both of you constantly watching the water situation of the garden, then you screwed up.

mg