Okay, before reasonable people (not just GUEST) star accusing me of cruelty to animals, please make note of the fact that I was wearing cheap rubber flip-flops, NOT steel-toed Doc Martens, when I kicked the armadillo. If I had kicked him hard enough to hurt him I would have broken my toe. It was essentially a nudge, not an attempted field goal. And the pieces of firewood I chunked at the critter were not aimed directly at him, the goal being to scare him off, not to actually hurt him. If I wanted to hurt the thing I do own a shotgun.