from the office of Dewey Cheatim and Howe, attorneys at Law,

to Mssr Oaklet, knave, highwayman, overall Blackguard

Dear Sir,

please be advised we are intercepting your correspondence to our client in the United States, and anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.

If you think for one minute anyone thinks you are keeping company with a female of any species other than bovine, and the thoughts of getting said cow on to a plane and to the Bahamas, not to mention generously slathing the sunscreen on her udders on a pristine white tropical beach, is a sad day for British security. We will be watching you , sir!!!!