Leadfinger:

I plead guilty to not having posted a profile, but please check out the "Member photos" section where I've posted a few revealing shots (not nekkid, but hopefully indicative of who I am).

Let me try to explain myself and my preference for semi-anonymity.

[Caution: thread drift. I didn't intend to go quite so far in my response, but I did, and here it is for what it's worth.]

Originally, over a period of several years, I would occasionally check into Mudcat, never giving a thought to membership. I would read some threads, and, when sufficiently motivated, would post a response as "GUEST, [my real name]." I would *always* append my name, in the interests of clarity; I certainly never felt that I had anything to hide.

Finally, at one point about a year and a half or two years ago, one member -- WYSIWYG -- responded within a thread, urging me to join and suggesting that I send her a PM to discuss it further. She not only persuaded me to join, but strongly encouraged me *not* to use my real name (as was my first impulse) but to adopt a "handle." Without any real conviction, I went along with the plan.

Since then, of course, I've become much more involved, and have found to my surprise that I *prefer* the modest level of anonymity that a fake name (and absense of a profile) provides. I enjoy using Mudcat as an alternative reality or fantasy world -- make of that what you will.

Case in point: I recently survived a bout with cancer. It occurred to me to ask you all for sympathy/prayers/virtual hugs, etc., but decided against it. I was getting plenty of that stuff from my real-life friends, family, coworkers, acquaintances, etc. -- more than I could comfortably deal with, in truth.

I found it was better for me to keep my virtual mouth shut here in this community, in order to preserve one "place" where I could still be normal, and it worked very nicely for a crucial couple of months. As I went through diagnosis, biopsies, and the beginning of treatment, I could distract myself here, exercising my right to be my own regular completely-OK self. When I eventually became too sick to sit at the computer, I disappeared for a while.

After completing a successful round of radiation and chemotherapy -- all the cancer is completely gone now -- but while still slowly recovering from radiation sickness (which is still with me, but slowly, finally, fading away), I returned here after an absense of about three months. It was like I was never gone. I was briefly hurt that no one seemed to have missed me, but all in all, I was glad to be getting back to one aspect of my everyday life.

So: who the hell am I, anyway?

I'll reveal this much: I spent about three years of my young adulthood in a full-time effort to "make it" as a musician and singer. I wasn't all that bad -- at least, I'm certain that I grew and improved immensely during that period of obsessive, full-time commitment -- but, for a number of reasons, I eventually quit back in the mid-1970s.

More recently, I've enjoyed a few isolated opportunities to perform again, and gotten plenty of positive feedback -- enough, at least, to feel confident that I hadn't made a fool of myself. However, as yet I have not taken any serious steps to restart a musical "career," even on a part-time basis. But I still might do so -- in fact, my recent brush with mortality may prompt me to move more decisively in that direction.

If I *were* actually functioning as a working musician, I would definitely post a profile, and would switch to my real name (or, in the unlikely event that I would have adopted a "stage name," I suppose I'd use that.) All in the service of self-promotion, of course.

In the meanwhile, I'll reserve the right to reveal only as much of myself as is unavoidable or as I wish, no more, no less. I'm not trying to hoodwink anyone, not intentionally trolling or starting trouble: I only use this one identity, and any opinions I offer are genuinely my own, at least at the moment. I reserve the right to be wrong, or even stupid, on occasion; in fact, since none of you *really* know me, I feel more free to risk embarrassing myself here than I do in real life. It's a good deal, and I recommend it highly to anyone.