"Blaming the people who fight back is kinda like blaming a robery victim for pulling a gun."

Responding in kind to insults or hurtful remarks in a thread is in no way analogous to a situation where your life is being treatened. It merely requires some self-control. Sometimes quite a lot of self control.

But hitting back in kind is completely self-defeating. You aren't shooting them or hurting them in any way, you are actually rewarding the attacker, making them feel good. You are making them them feel they've got through to you, and been noticed, and that has to make them more likely to carry on in this way.