This 'ere is the sort of f'read I was talkin' about, s6k! It's bloody offensive. Me Eddie says you ought to get the strap for starting such a rude f'read, and I agree wif him. It's not polite in the least. Jest wot are you playin' at? I feel like I 'ave to wash me 'ands every time I look at the title of this 'ere f'read. It's an outrage!

As for John from 'Ull, 'e assaulted me cousin Rutherford the other night over in 'Ull when 'e was politely askin' for a cigarette. John from 'Ull's a maniac. 'E ought to be put in the Tower of London or sent down under to Australia or summat like that...away from decent god fearing people wot puts their pants on one leg at a time and sings "Rule Britannia" in the shower like me Eddie does.

Disgraceful! Shocking! Scandalous! I am seething wif rightchous indignytion!

Mrs. Olive Whatnoll