If you're a parent, Roger, you undoubtedly on occasion -although perhaps not routinely ;~) - have found yourself telling a presistent beyond belief child, "No. That's it. Not another word." ??

Ebbie-.

Yes I am a parent (although our youngest is now 23).

When I was young and because, I suspect, of the example given by my parents, I always hated being told things like 'because I say so'. This was usually by someone in authority who supported and demonstrated double standards and expected me to do what they told me to, rather than follow the example set by their actions. I felt that these people demanded my respect but showed me very little respect.

Because of this, I always made a point of trying to ensure that I never set this example to my own children and was as consistent in my approach as possible. I am quite sure that I never actually managed to maintain this high standard and did resort, at the times you mention – to words and actions that I would later, not be very proud of. We all screw-up.

However, if/when I ever shut my children up by such tactics – rather than trying to explain and to reason – I would not expect my intelligent and questioning children to ever be satisfied with this and for this to be the end of it. No matter how unreasonable my children were acting - if they were telling me that I was being unreasonable and too set in my ways – they were usually right.

If I wanted a quiet life – it was better (for all concerned) for me to make some small adjustment, in response to my children's requests – than to simply maintain - that because my intentions were always well-intentioned - everything I did was perfect and could not be improved. If I didn't make even a small adjustment, I could be sure that my children would never give-up, until I did.