Well, I seemed to have opened up a can of worms, well, actually a most informative and stimulating discussion. I'd like to reply to some of you.

Annap & Kat, thanks for your kind words.. and yes, I like it here. .

Margarita, you mentioned a stigma, and while it may be partly that, it's more likely being raised by a military father (showed no emotion) and a strongly baptist mother (kept her feelings to herself).. While both, particularly my father, freely expressed opinions, it was done in such a way as to preclude discussion.. So I had no role models who were able to demonstrate that it was OK to show your feelings. Intellectually I recognize that it's OK but I haven't had the emotional training. .

Wyo, I'd be delighted if you'd loosen a couple of my buttons, but only if I can recriprocate. .

GG.. Do you come here only to make provocative comments to get a rise out of people? .

Lil Neo, it's much easier to express things here when I have time to think out what I want to say than it is to be spontaneous when talking face to face with someone. That's the part (well, one of them anyway) that I have to work on. .

Mick, right on with your description of the facets of who a man (better make that a HUMAN) should be. Would that we all could be that way, the world would be a far better place and this discussion would be off on a far different topic. .

Jeri, thanks for the hug, and one right back to you ( ) I don't fit a mold, in fact, I think both my family (3 brothers and a sister) and those I work with (all considerably younger than I) look on me as a bit of an oddball. I'm not gregarious and outgoing, in fact the opposite, but I just can't get excited talking about sports or last night's TV episode, as I watch about one or two hours every week. I'd much rather discuss politics, the growing gap between the well off and the poor in this world and what to do about it, how religions are stifling peoples minds, in short, real solid topics that can make a difference. .

'Spaw, I can relate to not wanting to seem a 'whiner'.. I still do it. .

Jack, what you describe about what it means to be a man applies to being a human…..

PeterT .. I think you are right about some people keeping a 'front' that, if broken, would shatter them. They are so caught up in being who they think they should be, or who their parents think they should be, that they haven't found out who they want to be themselves. There is another perception among some people, also, that it doesn't do to challenge people's beliefs too strongly because 'they are who they are' or some such idea. My partner, in fact, expresses a sentiment from time to time when I suggest she challenge someone on an issue. It can be difficult, as I went through a process of being on the receiving end of such a challenge to my beliefs over a period of 2 years. It was a difficult, and painful, struggle but I came out of it with a different view of the world, not as blinkered and naïve as I had been, and a stronger person for it. .

Lil Neo and Anna, I'd love to see your lists as well. 'Spaw, yew need ta git yerself sum of that there thred stuff, and a needul, and learn yerself how ta sew. Then yew can fix yer longhandled drawers 'n not have ta keep on a-pesterin the ladies…. Mind yew, if'n they wuz willin' to do the mendin' and even help with personal fittins, then I' likely be a-changin my tune some…..

Thank yew all… Davey :>)