If I may contribute 3 of the great (non-Christian)guiding tenets to live by are: 1 "Do what you will but harm none" (Wicca) 2 "Everything you do to others comes threefold"( Wicca) 3 "Know thyself" (the Oracle at Delphi) If you can manage within these 3 then you act from acceptance of your whole self and a clear understanding of that which you are. Sorry if this is a bit Zen but if you can not see and accept yourself "warts and all" how can you have honest, truthful relations or communication with anyone else? I have only been visiting and posting for a short while and it is clear to me already the affection, honesty, and supportive good feeling for each other that flys around here (liberally sprinkled with teasing and humour(British spelling)is more than a compenstion and counter for any "dark side" you may have.If you do not believe me read the posts from Catspaw and the supportive posts he received recently.