These topics seem apropos in light of the upcoming presidential election in the USA, especially when President Bush has alluded to receiving his inspiration from a higher power.
Politics
Independent: Shit happens Democrat: Shit is a vast right wing conspiracy Republican: The rich deserve more shit Moderate: We must also consider shit's right to happen Liberal: Shit will happen if we don't spend enough Conservative: The courts have allowed too much excrement Reform: We can't get our poop in a group Socialist: Support the equal distribution of shit Communist: Come the revolution, shit will not happen again Libertarian: Legalize all kinds of shit Green: Compost happens
Religion
Taoism: Shit happens Hinduism: This shit happened before Confucianism: Confucius say, Shit happens Buddhism: It is only an illusion of shit happening Zen: What is the sound of shit happening? Islam: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah Jehova's Witness: Knock knock, shit happens Atheism: There is no such thing as shit Agnosticism: Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't Protestantism: Shit won't happen if I work harder Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it Judaism: Why does shit always happen to me? Televangelism: Send money or shit will happen to you Rastafarian: Smoke that shit