The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #75102   Message #1317336
Posted By: Liz the Squeak
05-Nov-04 - 02:57 AM
Thread Name: Wee pen knife
Subject: RE: Wee pen knife
Let's look at this logically.

To stab someone through the heart, you need a knife blade about 5 inches long.

'Long' is an objective measurement. My hair is 32 inches long. My friend Sweetiepie has hair that is 1/2 inch long.   I've been told (all too often) that 4 inches is long. My cat Shadow has hair that is an inch long, but she is described as a short-hair. The long-hair cat has hair that is 1 1/2 inches long. I think 4 inches is a bit short to be honest....

Therefore we can logically predict that the penknife would be referred to as long, even if the blade were the size of a Stanley (craft) knife.

'Wee' is a general term meaning small. Therefore we can determine that they were not talking about a broadsword. That would be taking the piss, or wee. 'Wee' can also be used ironically, as in 'Wee Jummy' who just happens to be 6'8" square. This would suggest that the penknife could be bigger than strictly necessary.

A penknife is a knife for making pens, so logically it should be of a convenient size to fit in the pencil case.

So.... it seems the lady/gentleman/baby/filthy swine was stabbed with a penknife that was between 4" and 6'8" that would have fitted in the husband/wife/mother/dashing hero's pencil case and smelled of something disgusting.