I have just gone off Pete in a big way. The little bastard stole my lunch. I wouldn't mind if it was tuna or chicken or something meaty, but it was bloody beans on toast! Popped the plate on the caravan table, popped back over to the house to check I'd turned the tap off, and when I come back both slices are on the floor (butter side down, of course) and the beans are inside this small cat who - I swear - is grinning.
The sooner his bollocks are removed the better! (Not that it'll stop him thieving, but it makes for a modicum of revenge).