Here is a copy of the version sung by Pearl at Towersey in celibration of her 50th. Ps can anyone tell me more about the writers?

You're Only As Old
Dave Boulton & Jeff Parton

Now you're looking 50 I'll bet you a quid
That you're bodily functions don't work like they did
And to see yourself naked it's a little distressing
For your skin fits okay but looks as if it needs pressing

So don't think that 50's the end of the line
Cos you've run out of track and you've run out of time
Cos as long as you've got both your ardour and zeal
You're only as old as the woman you feel

Well round about 50 you might be concerned
At the largest amount of the candle you burn
But the size of your candle don't matter a bit
What's important is how long its burns once it's lit

And shortly you'll start growing hair once again
From your armholes and ear holes and holes I won't name
And no ones explained and I've never read
Why it grows down your nostril but not on your head

Oh when you were just 21 all your girlfriends
Used to say you'd go like a Mercedes Benz
Now they all say that you're engine is slowing
They start you by hand and jump on once you're going

You've got lotions and potions and cream you've got grease
To cover each wrinkle and crinkle and crease
They fill all your cupboards from the front to the back
You've got more oil reserves than the whole of Iraq

So don't think that 50's the end of the line
That you've run out of track and you've run out of time
Cos I've said it before and I'll say it again
It's not the men in your life it's the life in your men

Now you must have had implants the odd tuck or two
To keep that voluptuous shape that you do
But too many facelifts and just as you feared
You'll end up with a curly triangular beard

Now some ladies at 50 they may go so far
As to give up the habit of wearing a bra
It don't add to your style it don't add to your grace
But it pulls all the wrinkles from out of your face