Those suicide hotlines suck!!! Still, it is sometimes helpful to be able to talk to a real live human being who's trying to care about you. Assuming you can reach a live human being when you call... *rollseyes*

Anyway. I've been homeless for the past three years and was on welfare for most of my life. If not for the help of some people (some of them mudcatters) I would be too sick even to work at home.

Welfare now has programs available to those who want to start their own businesses as a way of getting off it... the info isn't readily available but the programs do exist. The programs are designed in such as way that it's almost impossible to succeed on them, but they can help.

Use the government as much as you can to get by. Seriously.

I'm married now and it'll still be a long while before both of us are out of the woods as he has some health conditions that make working difficult as well... but we're hanging on and it is slowly getting better.