As the practice of war continued to develop in the 20th century, it's obvious that targetting of civilians became standard practice.
War was no longer a formal contest between elite professional units.

Everyone on or near the battlefield now is a potential targets.

Some good friends claim that crimes committed by soldiers should be hidden or minimized, lest it give comfort to the enemy.

IMO, acknowledging,examining such disputed events should be the rule. Make sure that soldiers follow these rules.

On the other hand, if the rules of engagement are a hindrance, then stand up for your beliefs, and push to change the rules.

Otherwise, you condone great damage to whatever ethics you and your society claim to believe in.