How do you know when the stage is level ?
The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth ..

How does a lead guitarist change a lightbulb ?
He holds it up and the world revolves around him.

What's the difference between a banjo and a chain saw?
The chain saw has greater dynamic range.

What's the least-used sentence in the English language?
"Isn't that the banjo player's Porsche?"