Top prize for the first person to guess the tune of this little ditty!!!

Well i've worn these black britches
For many's the year
as worn out in the front, as they are in the rear
Per-fumed by sweet afton, and beer slops galore
But i never can wear these old britches no more

AND ITS NO, NAY NEVER
No nay never no more,
can i wear these black britches
no never no more

After my last performance
On saturday night,
I knew in my heart, they were getting too tight
I played the finale with gusto and flair
Bowed to the crowd
and my arse hit the air

Chourus

Well i was embarrsed
as you would be too
with me arse cheeks exposed, i didn't know what to do
So i saluted the crowd, with a dissatisfied grunt
And walked off the stage
......still facing the FRONT

Chourus

So that is the story
Of what happened to me
when i played with my arse out
To my mis-ery
But my con-fidence dented, it never will wilt
I play 5 nights a week now
wearing a kilt

Chourus

sorry..... i know, some folk have better things to do on a sunday morning than this, but you know when you're struck by the moment.......