Used to know a lot of those epitaphs, all actually true ones on gravestones....forgotten most but here you go with a couple:-

Here lies the body of Ezra Pound, lost at sea and was never found!

Here lie I, Martin Elginbrodde,
Ha'e mercy on my soul Lord God.
As I would do were I Lord God,
And ye were Martin Elginbrodde.

Best wishes.