The lift doesn't go all the way to the top does it?

Is that your own hair, or has your hamster escaped again?

Are you borrowing those legs from a sofa?

If brains were alcohol, you'd be a teetotaller.

If brains were balls, you'd be a eunuch.

Is your IQ bigger than your shoe size? (note - only really works well with the UK sizes, where 40 is really 7)

Give you a brain and you'd be dangerous.....

You were a Chippendale? Table or sideboard?

And from the pen of Gerald Durrell, naturalist, "He had a moustache like a small brown moth had settled on his upper lip."

LTS - Frankie, do you think you're getting chocolate off me after that?! Besides, I hardly know you.....