Damn Bert, I work me arse off so's I can eat like this. But since you insist, we will do something like this. We will start with a little Dublin Coddle. The ingredients for Coddle are 1 lb. of onions, 3 lbs. of praties (spuds, taters) 1 lb. of bangers (sausages for the heathens among ye), 2lbs. of thick bacon, some parsley and 1/2 pint of stock, if you have it. Otherwise you can use water. Cut the bacon into 2 inch squares and boil with the sausages for about five minutes. Put them in a dish. Cover them with thickly cut praties (I told you, dammit, these are spuds), the onions, and the stock or water. Cook this in a moderate oven, or you can simmer it on the stovetop. Either way, let it cook and hour.

Next we will have some Nettle broth. I loved it when my Grandma would have me gather fresh nettles for this. Use just the tips. Nettles are nettles, folks. It don't matter if ye live in the wilds of Donegal or the woods of Michigan. The ingredients are scallions, 2 lb boiling beef, 2 pts. of Nettle tops, a cup of barley, salt and pepper. Cut up the meat into bite size chunks. Putit and the barley in a pot and cover it with about a half gallon of water. Simmer this a couple of hours and add the chopped nettles and scallions. Cook for about another hour. Season to taste with the salt and pepper.

Now that you are warmed up, let's go with trotters and beans. Another name for this is a Crubín supper. That's pickled pigs feet for you, 'Spaw. You need to allow 2 pigs feet per person. We will use dried white beans, egg and breadcrumbs, and butter in addition to the trotters. Soak the beans overnight. Next day, cook the trotters by putting them in a pan and covering them with water. Bring this slowly to a boil and simmer for about 3 hours. You could eat them right now, but we are going to take them out of the pot, and split them. Then we are going to let them cool. Next we are going to coat them in egg and breadcrumbs, dot them with butter and grill them. We are cooking the beans at the same time. Someone cut up the Soda Bread, and MMario, would you get the proper of the vile black stuff please.........................Huh? Soda bread??....Any eejit can make that. Take 1 lb. of plain flour, 3/4 cup of buttermilk, a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda, and a teaspoon of salt. Mix all the dry ingredients together making sure that there are so lumps. Then add the buttermilk and mix well with a wooden spoon. Place the mixture on a floured board and knead it a bit. Place the mixture on a baking sheet and form it. Then make a cross on the top. Bake it in a hot oven for about 45 minutes or so. You will know it is right when the bottom sounds hollow when you tap it with your knuckle.

For dessert we will have Potato Apple. Grab some good sweet apples, 4 oz. of flour, 1 lb. of the spuds, a 1/2 teaspoon of salt and some good fresh butter. Bert, would you boil the spuds, please, and when they are done mash them well. No lumps, now boyo. Well done. Now we will mix in the flour and knead it to make a pliable dough. Careful on this step. If you overknead the dough it will toughen up. Now take the rolling pin ...............Sweet Jazus, don't let THE FAIR ONE get her hands on that rolling pin. She will put more lumps on my noggin than I need...OK, danger is over. Take the rolling pin and roll the dough out in a circle. Now we slice the apples into thick slices and place them on half the rolled out dough. We fold the other half over the top and pinch it all closed. Leej, would you mind handing me that griddle..........Damn, keep that griddle away from THE FAIR ONE, ya bowsie.............you folks are going to get me killed yet!!!......Ok, I have the griddle. We will now cook this on both sides until the apples are cooked. While it is still hot, we will peel back the top and put lumps of butter and spoon sugar into the center. Now cover it, wait until the butter and sugar have combined. Serve it warm, and wouldn't a bit of that home made ice cream go good with it.

How's that, Bert???

All the best,

Mick