Why should us Buddhists be left out...?

A Buddhist goes up to a burger stall and says to the vendor "Make me one with everything!"

He then lurks round waiting expectantly and then says to the vendor "I'm waiting for my change". The vendor quickly replies "I thought with you guys the change comes from within.."
__________________

Q: How many Zen Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Tree falling in the forest.
__________________

Q: How many wives does Buddhism allow?

A: You may have as many as your tolerance for misery can bear.
__________________

Q: How do I become a Lama?

A: Go to a monastic university and study for twenty-five years. Begin by memorizing Vasubandhu's Abhidharmakosha with its commentary (500 pages or so). Then study what you have memorised by hearing lectures on it and debating the contents with other candidates until you can argue every side of every controversy equally well. Then memorise several works of Nagarjuna, along with their commentaries. Then memorise the seven treatises of Dharmakirti. In additional to that study, you must master several forms of meditation and study tantric rituals for about two or three years.

Alternatively, you can come to America and just call yourself a Lama. Millions of nubile virgins will follow you everywhere and give you loads of money.
______________

Q: Why did the Buddhist refuse his dentist's Novocain during root canal work?

A: He wanted to transcend dental medication.
______________

Peace,

moo