Yesterday, I got a call from my friend Frankie. He called to tell me that his son-in-law Tyrone died during the night. The news hit me like a blow to the stomach. Tyrone was just in his 40's, and he and Michelle were only married a few of years ago. They lived upstairs in Frankie's house, and when the Gospel Messengers would get together to practice, Tyrone would quietly come half way down the stairs and sit there and listen to us, like a little kid at Christmas. We had no idea that he was even sick, and they kept the seriousness of his health problems from Frankie, so it was a shock to Frankie, too.

What can you do, but mourn death? There are no words that can remove the pain. It is just a process you have to go through. Death has touched many friends and fellow Catters this year and for those who celebrate Christmas, this will be a hard time for them.

But, while we mourn death, we can celebrate life. Death is a reminder of how precious life is. What a gift it is. When Frankie told me about Tyrone's death, the first thing I wanted to do was to hold my wife. Not to "cling" to life, but to "embrace" life, and rejoice in it.

   "How many days slip away without notice?
    How many friends have you lost on the way?
    How many good times are taken for granted,
    And only remembered when they've passed away?"

And, there are all kinds of deaths. The death of a marriage is a time for mourning, too. Even the worst, most destructive marriages.
My first marriage was like a re-make of Night Of The Living Dead, and I had to drive a stake through it's heart to be free of it. And yet, I mourned the loss of the promise and hope that brought two people together.

I have a friend here who sings with me each month at a nursing home who lost his Father a couple of months ago, and then went through a horrendous divorce. He has two deaths to mourn this Christmas. And, I have a fine friend here in the Cat I've met this year who will be struggling through a season where we are all supposed to be happy, mourning the death of his marriage.

People come to Mudcat for all sorts of reasons. Music, first I hope.
But then, there are others who come here broken-hearted and uncertain, just to warm themselves by the fire of friendship. They come asking for prayers, or just commiseration. Other's come who are hurting, to insult, upset and hurt others. Misery doesn't just like company. Sometimes it tries to make Damned sure it has it. But, for whatever reasons people come here who are mourning, whether it's the loss of a loved one, a pet, a marriage or even hope itself,
they are in need of friendship and support. And love.

So, for those of us who are mourning a death, there is a reason to celebrate life, too. Life is too precious to take for granted. I give thanks for the gift of another day, for Mudcat and all my friends.

Tomorrow, my wife and I will join Barbara and Frank Shaw and other friends to celebrate Christmas, singing at a Veterans luncheon. Saturday, Joe, Derrick and I will join Frankie as the Messengers mourn the loss of family.

As my friend Art Thieme usually ends his letters, that we may remember..

"Ain't life grand?"

Mourn death, but Celebrate life!

Jerry