As long as we're telling animal jokes, here's a parable:

A week or so before Christmas, a man received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity. The man tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music, and anything else he could think of to clean up the bird's vocabulary. It didn't help. Finally, he got fed up and yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. He shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. In desperation, he threw up his hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for several minutes. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, the man quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto his outstretched arm and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my inappropriate language. I'm sincerely remorseful for my transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior." The man was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. He was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, when the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

Don Firth

Happy holidays, all (whichever one you celebrate, if any)!