I'm a bit puzzled here. You say you have ADD but you post messages that are so long that most of us so called ordinary folk don't have the attention span to read them. I certainly gave up before the end of the first one.

To address just one issue. I would suggest that the problem with mathematics for you lies not within yourself but with your teachers.

Math itself can usually be broken down into quite small pieces and a good teacher should not present too much at a time to ANY student. Unfortuately good teachers are few and far between especially in the field of mathematics where most tend to present the subject far too seriously.