Okay, then here's one even a total moron couldn't possibly mistake for factual...

THREE SIX NINE

Three six nine
The goose drank wine
The monkey chewed tobacco on the street car line
The line broke
The monkey got choked
And they all went to Heaven in a little green boat


This seemingly innocent children's rhyme is absolutely relpete with Satanic and drug-related imagery.

Line 1: "Three six nine" 3+6+9=18. Another way to express 18 is 6x3 which is merely another way of saying 666, the mark of the beast. This sets the stage for the debauchery that pervades the rest of the song.

Line 2: "The goose drank wine" Need we say more. At least the initial drug mentioned, wine, is a relatively benign one.

Line 3: "The monkey chewed tobacco on the street car line" "Monkey" is an obvious reference to heroin addiction. The "monkey" is riding the street car to go buy the fix that he so desperately needs. He's chewing tobacco on the way to try to calm his jitters and cold sweats.

Line 4: "The line broke" "Line" is an obvious reference to a line of powdered drug waiting to be "snorted". Though more commonly used as a method of ingesting cocaine, snorting is one way in which heroin can be taken if a hypodermic syringe is not available. But, in this case, "the line broke" plainly means that the heroin was no good, possibly even deliberately poisoned. Had the "monkey" pissed someone off?

Line 5: "The monkey got choked" The drug addict or "monkey" snorted the poisoned dope and immediately went into severe, ultimately fatal, seizures.

Line 6: "And they all went to Heaven in a little green boat" The drug dealers, having gotten the troublesome "monkey" out of the way settled back with pipes of opium. Opium intoxication is often considered a "heavenly" high. And opium pipes are often made of brass which turns green with age from verdigris. Thus, the "little green boat" is nothing but an opium pipe that could use a bit of polish.