On account things are quite scrambled enough; but let me just addthat COmmander-in-Chief Bobert will need to finish his speech quickly as a phalanx of rabid right-wing neoconservatives are marching on his Capitol several thousand strong. They are carrying signs which say things like "End Times, Shmend Times, Bring 'Em On" and "We're Tough Enough for the Rapture" on them.

The National Guard has been placed on red alert.

A