"How To Pay Your Tax Bill"

Dear IRS,

Enclosed is my 2004 Tax Return & payment. Please
take note of the attached article from the USA Today
newspaper. In the article, you will see that the
Pentagon is paying $171.50 for hammers and NASA
has paid $600.00 for a toilet seat.

Please find enclosed four toilet seats (value $2,400)
and six hammers (value $1,029). This brings my total
payment to $3,429.00. Please note the overpayment
of $22.00 and apply it to the "Presidential Election Fund,"
as noted on my return.

Might I suggest that you send the above mentioned
fund a "1.5 inch screw." (See attached article...HUD
paid $22.00 for a 1.5 inch Phillips Head Screw.)

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and
I look forward to paying it again next year. I just saw
an article about the Pentagon and "screwdrivers."