Does this count as English? I learnt it as a kid in Yorkshire....

I were bahn dahn us ginnel
As t'pictures were loosin'
It were black as t'coil oil and mucky as t'tip
When I saw t'rag and boon man
All brussen wi' boozin'
'Twelting t'osses ower t'ead wi'a whip!

Arnie