Ever' mornin' at the MOAB you could see him arrive
He stood six-foot six and weighed about ninety-five
Kinda broad at the shoulders and narrow at the hip
Ever'body knew you didn't give no "lip", to Big Amos.

Nobody knew where he'd left his cajones
He just drifted onto MOAB and played his trombone
He didn't say much, 'cause he was loud and famous
And if you spoke at all, you just said hi, to Big Amos;

Somebody said he came from San Dieg'
Where he got in a fight o'er a chicken leg
And an upraised finger from a huge right hand
Nearly sent him off to the promised land, Big Amos;

Then came the day when a hard drive crashed
Data was lost and files were trashed
MOABites were prayin' and hearts beat fast
And ever'body tho't they'd have to work at last, 'cept Amos;

Thru the dust and the tears of this man made hell
Walked a giant of a man the MOABites knew well
Grabbed a sagging sector and gave out with a groan
And like a giant Oak tree just stood there alone, Big Amos;

With all of his strength, he gave a mighty shove
Then Stilly yelled out, there's data above
And twenty MOABites logged in for a data save
And now there's only one left down there to save, Big Amos;

With floppies and jump drives they started back down
Then came that rumble that the drive had ground down
And as smoke and gas belched out of the draw
Ever'body knew that he'd met ol' Spaw, Big Amos;

Now they never tried to reopen that worthless thread,
They just placed a marble urinal in front of it
These few words are written on a plaque:
At the bottom of this pipe greps a big, big man, Big Amos.