Dear Santa,

You have made a wise choide in not giving Cletus the job. Although I would have liked to have him and the rest out of here for awhile, he just would have caused you more problems than you need at this time of year.

The town has not yet forgiven him for the explosion at the condom factory, especially since much of the village is still cleaning latex off of everything. Only a few weeks ago he and Paw and the Reg boys blew up a two block chunk of downtown Columbus when they bored through a gas main while ice fishing on what they thought was a lake. Since it was actually the newly built NHL Hockey arena, they're in a bit of trouble there too.

Best Wishes on your journey....

Spaw