Well, El Greko, as a lot of us do here, I do use PMS to try to clear up confusion or conflict from a thread-- that's one reason we have PMs, and when both parties are open to actual communication they can be quite effective. (Besides, I'm a Bible girl, and it's Biblical.) But this usually comes to an end when either party repeatedly gives notice they want to be left alone.    So when it's clear the two parties are not going to be able to get on the same wavelength, sometimes it comes to that. I try to assume both parties are doing the best they can under the circumstances, and sometimes there just isn't sufficient foundation for the communication to continue-- it isn't really communication past that point, but noise.

Sometimes time helps-- one person with whom I once declined further communication wrote to me again MUCH later with an apology that indicated they had finally understood their end of what was stuck, and took responsibility for it. So it is usually my practice to open all PMs and to reply where I see reason at work, even if there has been a problem in the past. Or (like others) I sometimes just delete them unread, depending on the history with that person (and the PM title).

This is the first time I can recall going all Garbo on someone, though, right out in a thread. Some things have been said attempting to characterize my thoughts and/or feelings, and they are inaccurate. Maybe it's helpful to clarify that one can simply be over one's limit, and we should all be able to say for ourselves where the limit is without having to defend a reson for it. It's called Personal Boundaries.

~Susan