When I found that it was taking me about 7 hours to mow my vast estate, I bought a riding mower that reduced the time to about 1.5 hours.

But: (hang on folks, for major rant)

Riding mower purchase date: 15 MAY 2000.

September 2001, mowing/mulching debris pushed up from mower deck ignited from engine exhaust and burned out all engine wiring, dipstick tube, several "safety" interlock switches, and one drive belt. Mower inoperable. Dealer unable to supply parts needed or to identify an approved service facility.

Manufacturer's phone number found in paperwork from the time of purchase provided an 800 phone number, which produced only a recorded message that "all service must be obtained through the dealer. Three separate dealers provided no assistance or useful information.

Search of manufacturer's website at that time failed even to identify the "brand name" under which I'd purchased the mower as one they manufacture. Needless to say, no part information/identification could be found.

Calls to the first 80 or so (of about 140) "mower repair shops" listed in my local phone book failed to identify one who had heard of this "brand" mower, or would admit they might be able to fix it.

April of 2003, a "chance encounter" with someone who had seen a mower of the same brand identified a local supplier who was able to order wire harness and safety interlock switches for me. Additional minor parts obtained from original seller. Installation of repair parts required substantial disassembly and jury-rig special tools. In particular, one tension spring, approx 7" free length had to be stretched to approx 13" at about 280 pound tension for reinstallation – for which I cobbled a tool.

Total time to repair, about 10 hours. Time to cobble up tools, about 7 hours. Total cost of parts, about $230.

Repair of the mower was completed approximately June 1, 2003.

June 1, 2003 to September 12, 2004, I experienced more than 14 separate cases of ignition of clippings (counting just the ones I made notes on) without substantial damage to anything.

On September 12, 2004, the "last ignition" totally destroyed all main wiring, melted the dipstick tube, and apparently destroyed one engine interlock switch that had escaped damage in the previous major incident. The one engine switch cannot be replaced without removing the engine flywheel, and a special tool is recommended. While I could have made something up, I contacted the local service shop and they assured me they had the tool. Since it was "off-season" I decided to defer repair temporarily.

12/17/2004 I filed an information form with the US Consumer Product Safety Commission, describing the two major fires.

January 21, 2005, letter received from mower manufacturer:

"In conclusion, I would like to stress to you that we are sorry for the bad experience you have had with one of our products, and as a customer accommodation, we would be willing to have your tractor repaired under the terms of your warranty. Please contact me at your convenience and I can make arrangements through one of our independent dealers to get this accomplished."

A minor issue is that no way of following the instruction to "please contact me" was provided in the letter, so it was not until May 9, 2005 that I was able to penetrate the manufacturer's voicemail/web/email system to actually make contact with the author of the letter.

May 9, 2005, the manufacturer's representative confirmed the offer to repair the mower, agreed on the selection of the local service company that had previously obtained parts for me as an appropriate sevice agent, and the mower was delivered to the local agent for repair.

ca. May 18, 2005, I contacted the local guys and was informed that the engine manufacturer had sent a rep to check the damage (May 12). They had left instructions not to make any repairs "until authorized" and had estimated a response in "7 to 10 days."

The local shop informed me that all they received was the verbal instruction to "don't do anything" and that they had no contact information on the engine reps who were there. Apparently the engine guys also told them "Don't call us, we'll call you."

Since the entry of the "engine guys" the mower manufacturer has failed to return any reply to any calls or correspondence.

June 17, 2005 the local shop put me on hold and claimed to have called the engine mfr's local rep, (at that number he didn't have) who indicated "they'll have an answer within 2 weeks."

June 22, 2005 I posted to the "contact us by email" link at the engine manufacturer's site, asking who I should contact to find out what's going on. I received a prompt reply indicating that "someone will contact you." No one ever did.

June 27, 2005 I received a blank "Release from Liability" form from the engine manufacturer. The only instruction with it was, in essence, "Sign this or we'll keep your mower." This is the only contact I have had that I did not initiate, from any of the persons or businesses involved.

The email contact I posted to the engine manufacturer's web site elicited no information, but was followed up at approximately 10 day intervals with an email asking if "this is still an unresolved problem." Each was answered.

July 22, 2005 my last reply to "is this still open" brought a response giving the name and phone number of someone I should contact. The first three messages left on the person's voicemail were not returned. On July 27, he screwed up and answered the phone. Initially he denied any knowledge of the problem, but he did call back about 2 hours later, with the information "we've taken care of it." It took a bit of cross-examining to elicit the information that the engine manufacturer had "authorized repairs on June 22, 2005." He did admit that since the authorization had to be delivered, via a "Zone Office," through a "Regional Office," and then via the "Local Rep" he had no idea when the local service shop may have received it. Since I didn't receive their "liability release" form until a week after his stated date, I seriously doubt that any authorization was made at that time.

From the manufacturer: "Take it in and we'll fix it."

August 2, 2005: Day 91 since I took it in, I still have no idea what they intend to fix, or when I may have a mower again.

The local guys have conceded that they have the necessary authorization to proceed, and vaguely suggest they they may be "waiting for parts," but the office manager seems to be "off this week for the races." I don't know if he's racing lawnmowers or gocarts.

No problem. It only took me about 17 hours each of the three times I mowed with my "trimmer" 15 inch Delco electric and I didn't even chop the cord up. My daughter in law mowed the front once with their 21" gasoline pusher (after I rebuilt it for them), so it's only a little over the 12" "nuisance limit" in the back yard. I only got one citation from the city. It's warmed up now and the grass has quit growing. I won't really need it again until about September….

… of course both of the prior disasters were in September when there were a few fallen leaves on the ground…

John