The cook comes in; he is very big and carries a meat cleaver.

Cook (shouting) You bastards! You vicious, heartless bastards! Look what you've done to him! He's worked his fingers to the bone to make this place what it is, and you come in with your petty feeble quibbling and you grind him into the dirt, this fine, honourable man, whose boots you are not worthy to kiss. Oh... it makes me mad... mad! (slams cleaver into the table)

Good job I didn't mention the dirty knife

For those with a sense of humour - the full Monty Python sketch can be found here. http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode03.htm#5