I guess my song got erased in the reorganization, so here it is again. As you can see, my Willie is a victim, while Whip's Willie is a perpetrator. I think I'll put my victim verse at the end and sing it as a musical morality play. Anybody got more Willie verses?

Little Willie Jones, fell down the elevator
There they found him, six months later
They held their noses, and said, "Gee whiz
What a spoiled child our little Willie is."

Ridin' ridin' ridin on the dummy, dummy line
Rain or shine I'll pay my fine
Rain or shine I'll pay my fine
Ridin' ridin' ridin on the dummy, dummy line

And I am not THAT old, Whip.
-Joe Offer, age under 50 (barely)-