In lieu of singing "Happy Birthday", perhaps reprising this little ditty would be appropriate.


To the tune of the "The Addams Family Theme", if you please, complete with finger-snaps.


His name is Little Hawka
A broke-dick mamalucca
A real lame-assed Cannucka
He is fucked up, you see

A jagoff and a honkey
His best friend is a monkey
His room smells kinda funky
He is fucked up, you see

Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)
Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)
Doodle-dee-doo
Doodle-dee-doo
Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)

Bill Shatner is his hero
A man with talent, zero
We hope that it is clear, oh
He is fucked up you see

He has these alter-egos
Like Shane. They're his amigos
They go wherever he goes
He is fucked up, you see

Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)
Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)
Doodle-dee-doo
Doodle-dee-doo
Doodle-dee-doo (snap, snap)