Now listen here, Mom.

I have to go to Minneapolis on Friday. And on Sunday I have to fly back to Salt Lake City so that I can catch a plane to Boise on Monday morning, and I won't be back here until late Tuesday night.

I'll be around for a couple more days, anyway, but while I'm gone I want you to be good. And don't you believe all that cra...guff that Amos puts out. Granola Brigands and all that...that's a lot of hooey. Why, if the Idaho Legion had those Southern California girly-boys in the Legion Hovel for just one minute those Socal Socialites would be drunk under the BASEMENT table, cleaned out of their cash in a poker game, and found wanting in the...well, in the kissing department. In two minutes the Legion would have recruited 'em and shipped 'em off to Basically Training at the Booty Camp in Daniels. That's Camp "Jack" Daniels, and it's called that because when the crutes get there they don't know jack, the DIs jack around with 'em, and when they get out they've been jacked up pretty darn good. At least that's the official reason for the name.

But don't you let Amos fool you, Mom. You Know What Sort Of Person He Is. Stick with Stilly or Bunn or even Bee-Dubya.