Miss Hortense the Elephant said to her mater
"Now Horton there's something I have to relate!
You're old and you're fat! Yes you are! That is that!
And I'm tired of you snoring, and making me wait!"

Now Horton was kindly, and listened quite well,
Though much saddened by what his dear wife had to tell.
So he pondered and thought, and then pondered some more!
The he hollered, "Eureka!" and let out a roar!
And he ran down the road toward the Vibrator Store!!

When he got there, my golly, what greeted his eyes?
There were vibrators EVERYWHERE, of every size!
There were tiny small green ones, that were just right for bugs!
There were some ran on C-cells, and some that had plugs!
And some just for people who had to have more!
The wondrous collection at the Vibrator Store!

There were some shaped like dildos, and some colored green,
And some made of latex, almost real, it would seem!
There were handhelds and king-size, both wide, short and long,
And one that was ordered in just for King Kong!
There were colors, and sizes, and textures galore!
In the wondrous collection, at the Vibrator Store.

(Subsequent developments are left as an exercise for the learner...)