1---What color is an orange?
2---How long do you cook a 3 minute egg?
3---Who is buried in Grant's Tomb?
4---What MP3 type player gizmo shoould I buy Karen?

Okay, so fuck the first three and let's get to the MP3 thingy.

Everytime I research some new techno gilwhickie and then with great pride go out and purchase my selection, within about a week I feel like the dumbest ass in three counties. So let me just ask you whizzbangers out there what to get. There are obviously a few criteria and here they are now!

1--Said purchaser is not made of money. Nuff said.
2--It needs to hold a shitload of tunes. Some of these things seem to hold a gigabazillion and others a "paltry" 500 or so. 500 is fine, 5000 is outtasight and more is better but this isn't a big deal. I mean really when you consider the past...........
3--Don't tell me why anything is preferable to something else as in, "You definitely want the forfalator to ram 256K up the kazooderdoofle for the best response." I have no idea what you're talking about, don't want to know, don't even give the tiniest of shits. If you're one who is prone to this type of response, show some control and don't.
4--Small is great but again considering the past............What would be good is the ability to hook up to external speakers of decent quality. Hooking a midget device to midget speakers might look cool but if it sounds like an electric razor test center, I don't need it and we'll stick with headset. But if I can hook up a pair of decent sounding speakers, fantastic!!!
5--Ease of download and the source which I know is a big factor. If I can only get music from Cletus and Paw's Dunes of Tunes Internet Emporium and I need to buy only their player, I'll take a pass on the whole thing and buy an eight track.
6--Just give me your best selections, period. Brand, model, etc. .......seriously gang, tell me what I need to buy in terms of ease and sourcing of download, size, decent quantitiy of music held, best quality for the buck, of which we don't have many. What's your pick?

And of course you have my thanks in advance, for what piddling little that's worth.

Spaw