My favorite (true) SE story was the night I was running sound at a show. This fella comes up and tells me he was on next and was going to play the Digeridoo. This was a new one on me (and I'd even figured out that bagpipes need an extra mic to get the sound from the thumb hole on the back of the chanter!)
So I asked him, "How do you mike a digeridoo?"
"Well" he says, (and it becomes immediately obvious that he has spent too much time among the Aussies) "You get a five-foot piece of one-and-a-half-inch PVC pipe and ..."
"No, no, no!" says I. "I want to know where I place the MICROPHONE!"