Having knowledge of the 'other's' history, culture and personal experience increases understanding and the ablility to see the 'other' POV as having validity.

    Yesterday I listened to Terry Gross interview Jerry Mitchell on Fresh Air. Mr. Mitchell is a reporter for the Clarion-Times in Jackson, Mississippi, and is about to win an award (sorry--I now forget which one) for his investigative reporting that has led to the reopening of several civil rights murder cases from the 1960's. On another thread I have mentioned a book by Timothy Tyson called "Blood Done Sign My Name" about race riots in Oxford, NC in the early 1970's. By the way, both men are white southerners.

    We white Americans may have a tendency to forget that legal racial discrimination is NOT ancient history, and that blatant racial prejudice and discrimination, while not legally sanctioned, and not as common, are still very much alive and well in our country, especially here in the South.

    In our country, we are not merely experiencing the institutional legacy of slavery and the Jim Crow south, we are still seeing racism actively practiced on a personal level among some whites in every single community of this country. To not expect that everyday reality to color how many African Americans interpret all, or nearly all, of their social experiences with the dominant white culture, is very naive.

    And so....while I may experience Azzizi telling me the N-word is a no-no as condenscending, I can certainly understand that she may not have intended it to be so. And intentions do matter--but we can't get to the intentions without these open, honest, and uncomfortable conversations.

Janie