Australian jokes are just too easy...

Q: What is the difference between an Australian wedding and an Australian funeral?
A: One less drunk at the funeral



An English tourist visiting the Outback of Australia notices a farmer goin' at it with a sheep in a nearby field. The English guy taken aback by this, so he climbs the fence and walks over to the farmer. He taps him on the shoulder and says, "You know mate, back home, we shear those!"
The Aussie farmer looks frantically around and says, "I'm not bloody SHARING with anyone!"