I try never to tell anyone to shut up and if I ever completely lose it and tell someone that, I feel as though I've demeaned myself.

I have, on the other hand, made many stupid mistakes as I've felt my way around the musical world and tried to discover where I fit in. I've stuck with the music I have because musicians have been generous and kind to me, and on occasions too numerous to mention have shared their wisdom and experience with me. I know now how song circles work, what the etiquette of group music is, when to sing and when to shut up -- and when I sing, I generally contribute something to the musical experience now. I still don't always know what I'm doing, but I'm still trying to learn.

If anyone had been so rude as some of the stuff some of you are suggesting when *I* was just discovering this world and just learning the rules of the road, I would have run away as fast as I could in the opposite direction and it would have made me permanently sad -- as I'd wager it would with most of you.

Graciousness and generosity are almost always appropriate, even when we have to "train" someone to change a behavior.

WW