Sage glances over at the calendar on the wall above the card reader with Bert's number permanently entered in the memory. A well-rounded Scandianvian woman is wearing a skimpy furry outfit and short heeled boots and is posing provocatively with a Stihl chainsaw (or is that Husqvarna?)

Isn't this solstice? Dec. 22?

Rapaire rolls over on his bench and grunts. A loud fart is heard coming from the Mudcat Recovery Ward.